Creepy Covers, Pt. 3

Once again, I stuck gold at my local supermarket’s bargain book table. I stood transfixed at this one:

Maybe it was the long day at work, but it raised a host of questions for me.

1. What do you suppose is the “miracle” of the title? Is it that she is able to climb trees barefoot and coatless in mid winter?

2. How does someone wearing what appears to be a straight jacket climb a tree, anyway? And why? Does it have something to do with the fact that her name is “Ariel” and the cover copy describes her as “magic and moonbeams”?

3. How do you think the hero intends to talk Ariel down from her perch? I’m guessing something like “Honey, I found your matching tie dyed shirt. Now you can attend the Woodstock reunion in style.” will do the trick.

4. What is the best way to explain how the hero can easily reach her?

(a) stilts

(b) levitation (he’s all mavericky, I mean magicky, too)

(c) That yellow background does look kind of end-of-days-ish. Maybe he’s sitting on one of the four horses of the apocalypse?

Luckily the author more than survived this brush with cover suicide. You can find her book list (with each of her 5 pseudonyms, whew!) at Romantic Times. Ella March Chase is the name she uses now: she has a new historical fiction book coming out this winter).

Published in: on October 31, 2008 at 8:47 am  Comments (5)  
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Creepy Covers Part 2: Satan’s Stepback

Ok, so I bought Patricia Gaffney’s To Have and to Hold on Ebay, because it’s out of print.  I just got it today in the mail. I know it’s controversial. I know it contains one or more scenes of forced seduction or rape, depending on your viewpoint. But heck, the cover seemed so innocent!

And then I opened it and saw THIS:


Published in: on September 16, 2008 at 8:54 am  Comments (9)  
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Creepy Covers Part 1

I hit the jackpot at my local supermarket today. They have a table full of “pre-read” romances, and the money goes to charity. I actually found one of the few SEP books I haven’t read but don’t want to buy at full price (This Heart of Mine), but I also found this:


Published in: on August 23, 2008 at 9:22 pm  Leave a Comment